Cluck You, You Clucking Cluck
by Wolfish Oro
Summary: A rather unusual curse befalls InYasha... Whatever will the group do! Humor, humor, and more humor. Have fun, people! Oneshot, complete.


Yeah, Well, Cluck You, Too!  
InuYasha

* * *

It wasn't unusual for Kagome to come storming through the well back to her own time. It didn't phase Higurashi-kaasan in the least to see her daughter fuming as said daughter stalked out of the well house and into the house.

It was unsual that Kagome made a bee line to the computer, kicking Souta off and shutting down the video game he'd been playing.

It was _extremely_ unusal for Kagome to be carrying what seemed to be a bad-tempered, silver-feather, gold-eyed rooster under her arm.

* * *

InuYasha was as pissed off as Kagome, but for different reasons.

He was hungry, he was confused, his demon side was trying to force its way through because he didn't have Tetsusaiga, and he was hungry.

He was also royally pissed about being a rooster.

It was, as most of his troubles were, Kikyo and Naraku's fault. It was Kikyo's fault because she cursed him.

It was Naraku's fault because he'd killed Kikyo before Kagome had a chance to persuade her clay counterpart to repeal the curse. Yeah, killed. As in, it was permanent this time, for sure. No clay could withstand the rigors of being smashed, crushed into dust, wedged into wet clay to strengthen it, then being refired to become a chamberpot.

So, yes, InuYasha was a slight bit more than "furious". And because he was one raging rooster, he annoyed Kagome, Sango, and Kaede. Especially when he attacked Shippo or Miroku (the only reason he hadn't attacked Kagome was because she could still sit him, Sango would crush him with Hiraikotsu if he so much as clucked wrong at her, and Kaede had merrily threatened to make him into stew).

And he was hungry.

Later, maybe, while Kagome looked up chicken curses and cures, he would wonder if it was unfair to her to be so ornery right now. She always had a lot on her hands, and trying to feed a demonic rooster with a the fastest metabolism on the face of the earth wasn't helping any.

But in the meantime, he was hungry.

* * *

Kagome very nearly had a screaming fit when she found out that there was no cure for the Curse of the Chicken. But she found out immediately after that, although there was no _cure_, per se, there was a way to transfer the curse to another being. The only catch was that the one who caught the curse had to be about equal in power and rank.

Despite the fact that she was a miko, some very dark, wicked, _evil_ plots began to form.

She printed the pages out carefully, stapling them together and slipping them into a purse to go shopping. She left InuYasha with Souta under the express conditions that Souta was not to pull InuYasha's feathers (even if they were a very startling shade of silver, and would, very likely, be the best 'show and tell' presentation ever) and InuYasha... Well, InuYasha had a somewhat longer list. No fighting, pecking, clawing, crowing, go nowhere near Jii-chan, stay _out _of the kitchen, etc, etc.

With that done, she had some herbs to pick up, along with candles and colored chalk.

She found them fairly easily, all things considered. When she got back, Kagome packed all her new supplies into her yellow bag, grabbing a lighter and slipping that in, too. She set off to find InuYasha and Souta, and was pleasantly (and amusingly) suprised to see them playing video games. InuYasha was winning, despite being slowed in his clumsy use of talons for the joystick and reduced to pecking at the buttons on the controller. Kagome waited for the two to finish their match, then scooped up a protesting rooster- _damn, he still doesn't make sense... chickens can't talk, I guess, even if they are hanyou..._- ignored Souta's matching cries of outrage, and marched back to the well.

_InuYasha may be a bit miffed at being forced away from the game,_ Kagome thought with a smirk, _but he'll definitely thank me later...

* * *

_

Sango and Miroku stared at Kagome. "Say that again," Sango commanded.

Kagome obliged immediately. "There's no cure."

"You look oddly happy about that fact, Kagome-chan," Sango said, seeing her friend's rather wicked grin and the cunning gleam in Kagome's eyes.

"I am. There's no cure- oh, stop squawking, InuYasha, I'm not done yet- but there is a way to... _transfer_ the curse, if you get what I mean. To someone of equal power." From the blank looks on their faces, she knew they weren't getting it. Kagome sighed.

"Who do we know who happens to be a powerful hanyou?" Kagome said at last, and watched the dawning look of comprehension cross her friend's faces. InuYasha gave a happy little crow, and Miroku stared at Kagome.

"After all this time, could it really be so _easy_?" He asked. Kagome grinned and nodded. Miroku turned and grabbed Sango, spinning her in a joyful circle before starting a ridiculous looking dance with her. "Naraku wa to-ri, Naraku wa to-ri, Naraku wa to-ri i-mas!" The words were sang and Sango couldn't help laughing and joining in. Kagome watched Shippo join them, and picked up InuYasha.

"We'll have you back to normal tomorrow. I'd rather you spent tonight as a rooster." InuYasha clucked questioningly at her, and Kagome sighed. "It's new moon tonight, bird-brain," she teased lightly. He ruffled his feathers in irritation, but stayed sitting in her lap.

* * *

Sango helped Kagome copy the foriegn runes on the tatami mat, as Miroku set up four candles, one at each corner of the mat. InuYasha stood in the center of the mat, still looking rather embarassed about having molted twice last night... once to grow black feathers and once to regrow his silver feathers. Kagome had collected the feathers, saying they were pretty and Higurashi-kaasan would like such interesting feathers once they were woven into a bouquet of flowers. Shippo was tossing the lighter to Kirara, who batted it back to him with one of her tails. Kagome reached over and caught in it mid-air, lighting the candles with a rather practiced ease. She sat back and sketched in the final runes- InuYasha's name in black, Naraku's in red. Then she and Sango stepped back, allowing Miroku to begin a rather short chant.

They all watched as InuYasha grew, molted a little, grew some more, shifted into a rather deranged humanoid form, molted even more, and finally, his beak dropped off. Kagome threw him his fire-rat haori and hakama before he lost the last of his feathers, having anticipated his state of dress (or lack thereof).

They heard, in the distance, an outraged squawk, and the group grinned triumphantly at each other before setting off.

* * *

He was still trying to figure out what had happened when InuYasha and his group arrived. Naraku clucked irritably at them, unable to do much else. Kagome aimed an arrow at him as InuYasha made some comments about having chicken for lunch.

Naraku's last thought before he exploded in a rush of purified feathers was that he hoped he gave them all indigestion.

* * *

Oro: This one's for the bird-brains. Like Quill!  
Quill: Watch it, lady.  
Oro: Yeah, yeah, whatever. Man, this is the first InuYasha fanfiction I've done in two years. I can't believe I wrote this at all... anyway, key word here is "fanfiction".  
Quill: Meaning she doesn't own a flying-  
Oro: Language!  
Quill: ... _flip._

Dictionary:

_Higurashi-kaasan-_ Mother Higurashi (polite)

_Naraku wa tori/ Naraku wa tori imas_- Naraku is (will be) a chicken (lit. bird, but usually translated as chicken)


End file.
